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‘Tell Me Lies’ Cat Missal And Tom Ellis Praise Intimacy Coordinator’s Role In Steamy Bree And Oliver Scenes: “It Makes Intrinsically Uncomfortable Stuff Slightly More Comfortable” And here we are. The end of a mostly uneventful, meandering season that left the ravenous Bear-loving public still waiting for it to officially begin at the exact moment it ended. Most of the episodes were muddled with flashbacks, pretentious camera tricks, and what appeared to be an overreliance on the actors to improvise through dead spots in scripts. Next season, there should be more substance (right?) and hopefully 95%  less Fak. (I’d prefer 100%, but I get that co-creator and main Fak, Matty Matheson, is a sweetheart in real life, so he needs to be there in some capacity.)  Most of the episode is focused on Ever’s “funeral dinner,” where numerous high-level restaurant cooks and owners fete Chef Terry as she shuffles off to a life beyond the kitchen. Included in the gallery are some real-deal culinary superstars from actual real-deal restaurants—there’s Chef Grant Achtaz from Alinea,  Chef Wylie Dufresne* of wd~50,  Chef Christina Tosi from Milk Bar**, Chef Malcolm Livingston II from Noma. (Not present were Chefs Swedish, Iron, and Naked, who sent their regrets.)  The superstars from The Bear universe were also in attendance: Sydney and Richie, whose five-day stage earned him enough goodwill to score an invite. Luca, the pastry chef who spent time at Ever with Carmy, was there, too. Then there’s Shapiro, who is in charge of preparing the last meal for everyone in attendance.  However, the most important guest at the dinner is Joel McHale, whose character name is finally revealed: Chef David Fields. Once Carmy spots him at a nearby table, he’s so distracted his neck veins are twitching. He fills Sydney in on only brief snippets of the sadistic hazing he endured while he trained under him. And when Fields gets up to go to the bathroom, Carmy follows him there.  Sydney is concerned. “Do we think that’s going to end well?” Luca says probably not. Yet neither of them gets up from the table to intervene. Some confrontations are unavoidable.  Carmy creeps behind Fields and calls for his attention. Fields turns around and appears unsurprised that it’s Carmy, smugly satisfied that he’s made an effort to approach him, but he also makes a point to mangle “Berzatto” as a way to make Carmy feel even smaller than the already substantial height difference between the two. (Joel Mchale looks about 6’4 and Jeremy Allen White is probably 5’7.)   Carmy is so geared up. He looks up at his nemesis in the eye and admits that he’s always wondered what he’d say if he ran into him ever again. He starts with a halting “Fuck you!” but it does no damage.  Then he heads toward the bathroom, but Carmy isn’t done. “I think about you too much!”  Fields turns back around to let Carmy fire away at him — “You gave me ulcers and panic attacks and nightmares!” – but it allows Fields to counter with some devastating facts. He reminds Carmy that all his suffering transformed him from an “ok chef” when he arrived in his kitchen to an excellent one when he left. “I gave you confidence, and leadership, and ability–it fucking worked.” Carmy’s dumbstruck and begins to cry—nothing went according to plan. He steps outside the restaurant to process what happened and why it didn’t turn out how he hoped. It is easily the best scene of the entire season. Haven’t we all daydreamed about punching our bully in the face? Even better— punching him in the face in front of a group of peers who wish someone would finally do it?  This finalé could have gone differently—with Carmy removing his jacket, exposing the guns, and then pulling a surprise uppercut on him. Next, we see Fields knocked unconscious, plopped like a marionette with cut strings in a corner by himself, as all the other dinner guests take turns pissing on his head. Vengeance is served! But most people never get that satisfaction—and if there is a violent follow-through, it usually ends terribly with one person in jail for second-degree assault. What’s that Marcus Aurelius quote? “The best revenge is not to be like your enemy.” The more Carmy thinks about how Fields treated him, the more he realizes that he’s guilty of mistreating his entire staff in the same way. In this case, the only way to cure his own malignancy and exact revenge is for Carmy to become more of a nurturer.  Feeling overwhelmed, Chef Terry steps out to get some air and joins Carmy. Hee thanks her for what he learned inside her kitchen; it turns out she learned what she wanted outside her kitchen. “I want to sleep more, I want to go to London more, I want to go to a party, I want to meet people.” And that’s why she closed the restaurant—to live, basically. Now Carmy must grasp the stakes of his own life or else be banished to a life inflicting pain on others and himself. And for what? A Michelin star? As he makes his way home into the Chicago night sky his phone starts to blow up—the fate-sealing Chicago Tribune review has dropped. We see a spattering of words and phrases across his phone. And then Carmy lets out one last exasperated “Motherfucker!” as the L goes by. Then, three words appear on the screen:  To Be Continued. *** QUESTIONS I STILL HAVE: Why did this season have so many snooze-inducing scenes with two characters just staring at each other, waiting for the other person to speak instead of actual entertaining dialogue? A major one in this episode was Syd and Shapiro in the wine room. There was a creep factor there, but I don’t know if it was purposeful. But maybe he’s the usual psychotic chef with bad boundaries the industry attracts. Meanwhile, Shapiro also ruined what appeared to be a possible future sex-having moment between Sydney and Luca. Speaking of other potential sex-havers—how about Richie and Jess? MIDDLE-AGED DAD NEEDLE DROP: There are like a dozen. But here are the standouts: “In the Garage” by Weezer; “Within Your Reach” by The Replacements; “Can You Hear Me” by David Bowie; “Big White Cloud” by John Cale; “Disarm” by Smashing Pumpkins. CARMY ARM PORN: None! (Sleeved throughout the show.) So let’s pivot to CARMY NECK VEIN PORN.  Or … how about some JOEL MCHALE SATASHIT-EATING GRIN PORNOGRAPHY: * The only name I recognize is Wiley Dufresne, the chef everyone was writing about when I first arrived in New York City in the early 2000s because his restaurant served fish foam pudding or something similar. I definitely could not afford to eat there. ** The only place I’ve ever eaten at is Milk Bar, which I still order, mainly after 10 p.m. when I’m up watching Jason Statham movies. Nothing pairs better with mindless ultra-violence than cereal milk ice cream and birthday cake truffles.  *** Considering how much dogshit was thrown at us this season and despite my better interest, I welcome this news. Save it for later, lizards. Can’t get enough of The Bear Season 3? For more insight, analysis, GIFs, and close-ups of Carmy’s arms, check out some highlights of Decider’s coverage: A.J. Daulerio is a Los Angeles-based writer and editor. He is also the founder of The Small Bow, a recovery newsletter.

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